Welcoming a child into your family through adoption can be an amazing experience. If you have made the decision to adopt an older child, the adoption experience could be challenging for both you and your new son or daughter. Understanding the unique fears and hesitation that an older child may feel when being adopted is important when it comes to helping your new son or daughter feel more at home.

Here are three tips that you can use to make the transition into your home more accommodating for an older child.

1. Avoid sensory overload while your new child is adjusting.

While infants might have the ability to take in many new sights and sounds without becoming overly stressed, an older child could experience sensory overload when transitioning into a new home. Rather than planning a myriad of welcome parties and outings as soon as you bring your adoptive child home, allow time for your older child to adjust to his or her new surroundings.

Before introducing external stimuli right away (like the extended family or a lot of friends), give your child time to become comfortable in your home. When an older adoptive child recognizes that your home is his or her new safe space, you can begin to introduce new people and experiences without inducing sensory overload.

2. Re-parent your child to establish secure connections.

Many older children that find themselves in adoptive homes have had negative experiences in the past. Many of these children spent significant time in foster homes, and some never received the one-on-one attention that helps to foster relationships between a parent and a child.

Despite the fact that your new son or daughter may be older when he or she comes into your home, you should re-parent your new child anyway. Sing lullabies to your older child and take the time to rock him or her to sleep. These basic parenting tasks can help to establish secure connections between you and your older child, making the transition into your home a lot easier.

3. Assume your child is younger than he or she actually is.

In order for children to progress, developmental milestones must be reached. When a child has been in foster care, he or she may be behind when it comes to reaching these developmental milestones.

By assuming that your child is younger than he or she actually is and treating him or her accordingly, you reduce the pressure the child feels when transitioning into your home. As you get to know your child's boundaries and limitations better, you can adjust the way that you treat him or her in the future.

Making the transition into an adoptive home can be challenging for an older child. Be sure that you are avoiding sensory overload, establishing secure connections through re-parenting, and identifying delayed development to ease the transition for your new son or daughter. Contact a licensed adoption agency in your area for more information.

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